We Are the Champions

April 8, 2006

That's just what I'm listening to right now-no other reasoning-for those who care to know…

Sisters boyfriend is here for dinner. I never have anyone over…everyone's always busy, and it's not like I have a boyfriend-I just wish people would stop rubbing it in my face…It's a real open sore for me.

I've been realising how desprate I am lately. It's really pretty depressing…but life goes on.I had SO much chocolate today…and doghnuts, cookies, taffy…the list just goes on! Plus I had BOTH lunch periods-kewlio.

Going back to pathetic desperate depressing crud however-a friend of mine wants to make a deal with me-I find out if this boy likes her…and she gets Chase to kiss me-but if I do that there's so many problems with that. I mean I don't want him to kiss me because of some bet, or dare-I want it only if he really means it…But at the same time-part of me could care less-I wanna rip that voice out and silence it for good. I don't know what I should do-I want to help her-but another friend of mine likes the same guy-another stone in the pile. So I get a meaningless kiss, and another depressed friend-but one friend MIGHT get her dream guy and be happy…Is it worth it? I don't think so. But how do I tell her that? She seemed so happy just talking about him!! I'll just take it as it comes I guess…

At the same time-good news. Grandpop has a forge in his backyard-and he might let me make a sword-or a dagger, or a bow, or all of them-for my Renaissance Project. A REAL sword. Awsome huh? And I have permission to bring them to school if I make em. Kewl. I tolf chase this-he said if I gave him one I caould hug him as much as I wanted all this year, next year, AND highschool…Tempting-no? But I dunno, I mean what if he gets in trouble for having it? I know it sounds like I'm making problems but…and what if Grandpop says no? What if I can't even MAKE the damned thing? Oops…don't really want to cuss, but it's how I feel-sorry.>_<But I mean, people keep dangling bait in my face-and when I jump-and I jump high-they yank it away-so it's just out of reach. Just where I gotta go a little farther, just where I can't reach. Sigh.

Enough of that-for now. Queen is an AWSOME band. And coffee, chocolate, and pain killer are miracles or the modern world….

Movie time, gonna watch Corpse Bride. Nice huh? Talk you all later!

-Jessica Lynn


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