Jordan + Nicole = Mentalities = Bad Day-Go Figure

June 13, 2006

I think I expect too much of myself. I mean-I expect to be thin-fact-I'm about 20 pounds underweight-but that doesn't make me LOOK thin. Should I care? No. Do I? HECK YEAH. I expect myself to be near PERFECT. No, I take it back-ABSALUTELY PERFECT. Am I? GOD NO! I mean obviously I can't spell. But no, REALLY. I mean look at this-I complain endlessly…*glares* ok maybe that's what journals and blogs are FOR, but STILL! Ohhh…..Geez what's with these headaches? Is it the not eating? No…I ate today-I was depressed….ohh that reminds me I have a couple pounds of chocolate I can scarff. Cool. Ahh…but I shouldn't…The hell with my idealistic mind-my body wants chocolate so it's gonna get it!


Oh, right, back to my life. So anyways. Despite my efforts, I'm still your basic freak magnet. And it seems like all the guys that I have any real interest in A-are taken; B-hate me; C-are REALLY touchy, and I'm afraid to risk getting any closer to them for fear of ruining what we have; D-just don't want to believe I have any interest in them at all, so shun me for a few days then go back to "normal"….(oh god-I haven't even eaten a whole bar of chocolate-wth??? I used to be able to grab a BAG and eat it!….it might have something to with the fact that this is DARK chocolate…..hmmm)

Right-back to the matter at hand.  Nicole-of all people-is giving me problems. Now I'm saying she MENT to do this, or that she's evil, or that she's plotting against me or anything (or maybe she is!!!-no jk) but she did do something really mean… See I was talking to her about my weekend. You know cause that's what girls do. Well for once at least ONE person wanted to actually go SOMEWHERE with ME. YAY! That person was Jordan. Ok, so little known fact here-when you set a time and place with someone and go it's called a date. It doesn't MATTER if it's a guy and a girl, or a bunch of friends, or just two friends, or whatever-it's a date. Keeping that in mind now, I told Nicole I ALMOST had a date on Friday, she's like OMG with who-and I'm like Jordan-and you know I was SERIOUSLY going to explain the whole friggin' thing to her-but A-her stupid internet kicked her off, or she had to go, somethin' like that, and then B I had to go cook, and eat dinner. So I couldn't, so whaddaya know-I get back and Nicole is talkin' to Jordan right? Nicole's telling me that Jordan says I'm lying and Jordan is asking me WHEN did HE almost go on a date with ME? And (excuse my language) I'm just like FUCK. What the hell is going on here??? So I had that mess out-after a nice long drwn out fight with my mom. Joy. Nicole thought the whole thing was pretty funny-I was just about ready to fall asleep on my feet already, and pretty darn annoyed too. But for some reason- I was SO SURE that Jordan was gonna be pissed at me-don't ask why-cause I don't know. Well I do-but you know-chances are I'm not gonna tell you. I cannot possibly explain to you how impossibly happy I was that he wasn't mad at me. Yet another thing I'm not explaining here. But yeah.

So let's see. TODAY-I wore this EVIL LOW CUT TANK TOP-god…do I need to say anymore?

Umm…..right, so that covered my Nicole problems altogether, some of my Jordan problems, and some of my mentalities, now for the rest! Joy.

Ok. So um…Jordan didn't really talk to me today-now yeah sure it could've been I wasn't exactly talking to him either but whatever-I have this habit of blowing things out of porportion. But I didn't play basketball today either. I just sat on the sidelines and watched. I don't even know if anyone knew I was there. I was only paying half attention to what was going on. In the end my mind just totally wandered. And good god Basic Ed. was hell for me. Yes more than usual. For once Mrs. Tracy had nothing to do with it. I don't exactly know why-probably my headache? No, I don't know. And yes I mean it…I think. But god, *blushes* (this is weird) I couldn't stop looking at Jordan. For some odd reason he was just on my mind all today. In every subject. God I'm glad no one called on me in class-I bet I would have said his name instead of answering the question-yeah it's THAT bad. What was so special about today huh? Was it that sleeveless shirt he was wearing? Was it my sudden, seemingly random state of depression? My headache? I think I vote the sleeveless shirt-god he looked hott in it *blushes* no…He was in my head before I even saw him today. He was in my head almost as soon as I woke up! Maybe I'm just REALLY emotional today…

This is just great. I said I wouldn't let Jordan toy with me anymore. But then what is this? It's not intentional-obviously-but I'm letting it happen anyway.

I say we shoot cupid and see how he likes it.

-Jessica lynn


2 Responses to “Jordan + Nicole = Mentalities = Bad Day-Go Figure”

  1. Crossover said

    nice background, peace

  2. crazyguy1292 said

    jordan never looks hot……..

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